Thoughts on Leadership from Kahlil Gibran

Thoughts on Leadership from Kahlil Gibran

Thoughts on Leadership from Kahlil Gibran

Anyone that knows me knows that I like to read “guru” books on leadership and teamwork but am also often highly critical of such books. It is not that I do not believe that there are people that have through their experiences become experts in these areas. It is more because I still feel the best way to learn to be a better leader is to be a leader. Successes, failures, and time are the best teachers of leadership and the best tools for enhancing and strengthening relationships as a leader.

I have also found that some of the best tips I have read have come not from “guru” books but from fictional accounts of young sorcerers coming of age (“A Wizard of Earthsea” by Ursula K. Le Guin), creatively imagined conversations with God (“The Shack” by William P. Young), and philosophical poets like Lucretius, Dante, Goethe and (more contemporary) Kahlil Gibran. There are a few books that I keep handy and have read multiple times and two of them are from Gibran: “Sand and Foam” and “The Prophet”.

I have tweeted many quotes from Gibran and encourage you to follow me on twitter @adamstanleyatx to read some of the quotes. In this blog, I want to share brief thoughts on leadership from various Kahlil Gibran books.

1. A little knowledge that acts is worth infinitely more than much knowledge that is idle.

I have been quite lucky in some instances, and strategically successfully in many, at hiring and retaining really smart people. I always brag on my teams as being so much smarter than me. These technologists, business analysts, financial wiz kids, and others have truly shown they know their stuff; the “A” list in terms of knowledge. But, the ones that have truly stood out are those that were actually able to take that knowledge and act on it.

A successful business leader has to be really good at both developing ideas and actually implementing them, and this is one of the things that set smart people apart from effective people. Having a good operations mind that augments strategic thinking is critical as it’s about developing a strategy and making that strategy a reality. I advise my young leaders to learn how to contemplate problems, really analyzing what the root of the issue is and defining the boundaries of your required work. Then, roll up your sleeves, develop a strategic plan, and deliver on the necessary change required to enhance value.

2. Most people who ask for advice from others have already resolved to act as it pleases them.

How many times have your employees been made to feel that regardless of what they say, you or other leaders will still act exactly as you initially planned? I had a colleague who was absolutely notorious for this. This particular person would hold meetings with dozens of individuals gathering feedback on a certain initiative. Hours of time would be spent in one-on-one interviews, small group sessions, and through surveys and data gathering. Yet, if you were to do an analysis of the delta between original and final plans of this individual, the result would be close to zero. The fact of the matter is that this person did not really care what others thought, but simply felt there was a need for the appearance of validation. Over time, guess what happened? People began to spend less and less time providing feedback, declined meeting invitations and only supported the initiatives grudgingly after an executive mandate.

How much more powerful could this person have been as a leader if feedback and input from diverse constituents had truly been used as an enabler versus a symbolic validation? I have found that my greatest successes have come from situations where I have allowed people to openly challenge my assumptions and provide candid feedback on my ideas. As a leader, you have the opportunity to leverage the strength of your team to magnify exponentially your power. But only if you truly resolve to listen and react to their feedback.

3. “I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet, strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers.”

I’m sure you have a few of these teachers in your life as well. Learning from bad leaders and employees is just as effective as learning from the good ones. And I’ve had both. Truly, there is nothing that makes you more cognizant of your listening skills than being in a room with a blowhard that just won’t shut up! A good friend once told me I should use a formula for calculating the optimal participation of each person in a meeting. He basically said to take the total number of time devoted to discussion (i.e., not including the base presentation of content) and divide it by the number of people in the room that are there in a contributory role. If you are one of 6 people in a 30 minute meeting and have talked for more than 5 minutes, take a breath and contemplate the conversation. Yes, you’re smart, and perhaps you do know more about the topic than anyone else in recorded history. But, wouldn’t it be interesting to hear what the other lesser mortals think?

Today, I commit to be a better listener, a more tolerant manager, and a kinder colleague and partner to all those in my professional environment. And via this blog, I give a hearty and most gracious THANK YOU to those of you who taught me so much through your (bad or good) example. You know who you are (I hope)!

Be Well. Lead On.
Adam

Adam Stanley

Adam Stanley

Adam L. Stanley Connections Blog

Technology. Leadership. Food. Life.

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Thoughts on Relationships from The Shack

Thoughts on Relationships from The Shack

Today I shared a series of tweets on relationships, the primary unit underlying ALL leadership and teamwork constructs. I used quotes from one of my favorite books, The Shack by William Young.

In my various leadership roles throughout the years, I have developed relationships with hundreds of leaders. Some worked with me, many worked for me, and of course there were those in positions of authority over me. I have discussed leadership so many times over the years and have typically thought of this as one of my key strengths. Recent conversations and events have truly forced me to rethink my focus and ideas on leadership. Is being a good leader truly enough?

In The Shack, Young uses a fictional account of a meeting with God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit to emphasize the role of relationship as the single building block of life. And the more I read, the more I realized how true this really is. I have been blessed to have amazing relationships with most people who have ever worked for me and do consider myself a strong leader. However, what really makes my life fulfilling (or not) is the energy I draw from unique and valuable relationships with my teams, peers and superiors, with my family and friends, people at church, business relationships, and even random people on the street or in stores! Life is full of relationship and the more you embrace people for both who they are and what they uniquely bring to you (and you to them), the richer you will be.

Here are the relationship quotes I tweeted from The Shack today.

1 “You cannot produce trust just like you cannot ‘do’ humility. It either is or is not.”
2 “Lies are a little fortress; inside them you can feel safe & powerful.”
3 “You don’t play a game or color a picture with a child to show your superiority.”
4 “Each relationship between two persons is absolutely unique. That is why you cannot love two people the same.”
5 “Submission is not about authority and it is not obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect.”
6 “Forgiveness in no way requires that you trust the one you forgive.”
7 “Life takes a bit of time and a lot of relationship.”

I am especially fond of YOU and our relationship.

Best, Adam

Especially fond of you